All I ever wanted was to be a mom. I’d dream of the day I’d get married, but longed for the day that I could have a baby of my own. I remember thinking (a year before EM and I got engaged) that I’d never get married, that it wasn’t in the cards for me. Then I stopped looking. I stopped focusing on finding mister right and prayed to God that the next guy He put in my life would be THE guy and that he better work hard to prove that he was the one God had sent.
It had been over a year since EM and I saw or even spoke to each other. I had put him out of my mind, after a few long Adele style sob sessions – Ok, maybe more than a few – Thinking he would never be more than a schoolgirl crush. Then one day – he was back in my life. After making countless excuses not to see him, trying to guard my heart, I caved and figured, if I saw him at least once, he’d then leave me alone. Well God listened to my prayer and He made sure that EM worked hard to prove that he was the one. 7 months later we started dating. 4 months later, we were engaged. 6 months later, we were married. And 9 months later, I became the mom I had always hoped and prayed to become! I was the wife to the man I loved, and now a mom to a precious little boy. I had it all!
Then life really set in. Being a mom isn’t all sunshine and butterfly kisses! It’s hard! It’s emotionally, mentally, and physically taxing! It challenges you in ways you never thought you’d be challenged. You stop thinking about yourself and start thinking solely for the benefit of this other person. This perfectly created creature that relies upon you completely! With such unfailing trust this little person grows and is molded into who they are by your love and daily example. If that isn’t an important job, I don’t know what is!
Moms, especially stay at home moms, are so often ignored, so often made to feel less than, so often made to feel as though they gave up a potentially wonderful life and a career to have kids. But the thing is, ALL of us make sacrifices, whether we have kids or not, whether we stay home or not, they’re not greater or less than, they’re just different.
All moms make a huge sacrifice, in that they begin living their lives for an other. Living their lives to set an example for the future generation. We no longer get to create our own schedule – it’s now created for the betterment of our child. We no longer get to make spur of the moment plans with friends, as many of us can’t afford a babysitter or don’t have local help. We no longer get to sit in silence and just think. Kiss your brain cells goodbye – mom brain is REAL! We no longer get to fit into the cute top we bought in college – or at least many of us don’t. We used our body to sustain another. But for the many things we sacrifice, we gain tenfold! We gain the love of a person that is like no other! A person who sees the good in you on days that you feel your worst. A person that so easily forgives you when you feel as though you have fallen short. A person who doesn’t judge you for what you look like during the day or at the end of it – many of which might be showerless, makeupless and filled with dry shampoo! They simply love! With their entire being, they love!
I can’t tell you how many times I have felt as though I have failed my kids. Felt as though they deserved better than what they were given; Me as their mother. But then I’m reminded that I am worth it! I am worth their love! I am not perfect, none of us are. It is loving someone flaws and all that makes that love worth giving!
Mamas, I know there are days when you lose your temper, when you feel as though the entire world is against you, when you feel as though you just want to wave the white flag of defeat! We ALL have them! You are NOT alone! But remember this, because of you and your sacrifice you are helping create a brighter future. Because of you and your sacrifice you are helping mold our future generation into a more giving, a more loving, and a more caring generation than the one before.